What Does An Out-of-Work Film Programmer Do?

This post is like the opposite of a Bring-Your-Gainfully-Employed-Adult-to-School type of show and tell. My days usually look like this, though the setting varies. The present set-up at James and Jenn's in San Diego is definitely the warmest...



The important thing is to face each day hopefully, with a lot of clothes on.



This is not always easy. A few months ago, on the day that I first sat down to start my job search in earnest, the very first thing I came across was news of the 25% staff reduction at Film Society at Lincoln Center. Today there's this again...

It is at once 1) validating re: my current condition, and 2)extremely depressing.
I do not see light at the end of this tunnel, though I'm sure it's there, somewhere, far off...

Meanwhile, I am taking advantage of the, um, free time for visits with friends and family who are good enough to take me in and let me feel productive in their lives while I search for a job. This involves a lot of kid visits and babysitting. In the case of my nieces, the kids are really happy and excited when I arrive and couldn't be cuter...





And by the time I leave they are miserable and can't wait to see me go.



Maybe it's a good thing for our relationship that I don't get to see Malcolm T as much?



In the case of Oliver, after the last 3 days when it was just him and me, we both really wanted more of each other. Here he is at a big gaping garbage hole that we checked out on the daily coming home from school.



I also got to see some kids I haven't seen in so long that they don't even look like this any more...





I've also taken to crashing birthday parties of kids who I don't know...yet. Free cake!



Then there's housesitting, which is a nice way of saying that my wonderful friends let me stay in their awesome homes while they are away so that I don't feel quite as home-less as I am. I break up a day of futile resumés and cover letters with useful things like watering their plants...



And I take care of their pets and pray that they don't bring flailing lizard tails into the house.



My favorite task is cleaning out the kitty litter. Mmmmm!

I also give impromptu lectures and book reports to visiting friends, just to hone my public speaking skills...



Bassemah just tried to talk me into going to work with her tomorrow by saying, "You can have 3 hours of internet!" I am not a sucker. Why would I go to her yucky work at school when I can do my futile work searching in this setting?


Cheers! Here's to finding a job before 2011!

Land of the Happy Animals

Maastricht Moments

FINALLY

November 5, 2008

I'm still waiting for it to sink in.

I was so nervous and doubtful and scared and anxious, despite a positive and assured attitude that I was projecting on election evening. Robyn and I went to Marx Cafe, and as soon as we got there I was annoyed with people. I'd SO been looking forward to this for so long, but when it came down to it, I didn't feel so hot, felt kind of solitary. Margaret and Leesil showed up and their friends too, and the place got more and more crowded and we were squinting at TV monitors across the room. I was irritable and worried. The results so far looked hopeful, but I didn't trust it. I had such matter-of-fact hope for the last two elections, and, deep down, I just didn't have any hope left for this one. But I believe in the power of positive thinking, so I was just putting it out there...


When we left Marx, Obama had Pennsylvania and it looked like he'd get Florida. I talked to Gene briefly on the phone and he said Obama had secured Ohio. That seemed like it put him over. But I was still skeptical. We went to Margaret and Leesil's and continued watching. The TV stations were so desperately creating ridiculous filler. The panels of experts with their laptops? The holograms? We watched, cynically, uneventfully.

Then, very SUDDENLY, there was a graphic on the screen saying, "Projected Presidential Winner Barack Obama." We looked at each other, not comprehending, unable to compute. Amid all the fodder, they were going to drop the news, just like that? It didn't seem like it could be true. I felt like we sat there for 5 minutes or so, looking at each other, looking at the TV. I got up to hug Margaret, started crying, shocked, heard screaming outside. So I ran outside and started screaming too, jumping up and down (on my left leg), neighbors emerged from their houses, banging pots and pans, screaming all around, ecstatic elation abounding, all around, hugging and jumping and screaming and dancing, people I've never met and probably won't again- we were all HIGH, completely another state of consciousness, I had to go over to the porch with the folks who'd first let out hollers. We fell into each others' arms, jumping and screaming. They invited me in and we drank celebratory Hennessy and wandered around ecstatic and incredulous, went back to the porch. Other neighbors came out, we were all friends, we were all unbelievably relieved.

We went down to the White House, we had to. It was packed and euphoria emitted from everyone all along the way. People were waving American flags out of cars, and for the first time that I can remember I felt pride attached to that, all of a sudden I had to put my cynicism in check- I didn't know what to do with it (and have often felt that way since then). We made our way to the intersection of U St. and 14th. The streets were full at midnight. Everyone was walking in a daze, huge smiles, muttering to themselves in disbelief, trying to digest what had happened, loving everyone else, congratulating and celebrating and incredulous. It was unreal.

Now it's September 2009. It still surprises me when I watch a newsclip of Obama speaking and realize that it's all true, that this was really possible. Is it?

Nurses I Have Loved

Post-debate TV cart

To borrow a phrase from Red, "Look how lucky I am! Take a picture!" Giovanna's pumpkin bread and Jenn's leg massage making me pinch myself.

Vanna and Jim braved DC driving to come visit. And so nice it was! They sent me all the best cards...

G & Nzingha & Jenn too.

Jenn and I watched some Women Make Movies screeners, this was THE WOMEN'S KINGDOM, I think.

Jenn cleaned my whole house before she left!

After the bandages came off- lookin' good!

When Aaron arrived, my camera got somehow pink for a while.

He took me for glorious late night walks...

and played wonderful music for Jackie, Robyn and me! A neighbor from next door even came over to tell us we needed to keep it down, but that our harmonizing group-sing of "Brown Eyed Girl, "sounds really good."

Robyn did ALL my laundry, dude! And look how BEAUTIFULLY folded everything is! So spoiled I am...

Heavenly Prudence and her heavenly tapanade. Chopped by hand!

And Pru's DELICIOUS curry meal, with Nurses Robyn and Rowan.

Pru!

Morgan came over from next door, she has the YUMMIEST belly.

Serious scrabble with Sara Varon.

She kicked my ass, actually.